But the gleam of a bright red fire fire through the parlour window had more effect in cheering cheer my spirits , and rebuking rebuke my thankless repinings , than all the sage reflections reflection and good resolutions resolution I had forced force my mind to frame ; — for I was young then , remember — only four-and-twenty — and had not acquired half the rule over my own spirit that I now possess — trifling as that may be .